


Bring the Boys Back Home

by KelliDiane



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, child!louis, cystic fibrosis, military man, please take some time to learn about the mutation, teen!liam, teen!zayn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-08
Updated: 2014-07-08
Packaged: 2018-02-08 00:50:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,989
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1920450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KelliDiane/pseuds/KelliDiane
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis claps excitedly. “Come on! Come on! I need to tell Santa what I want for Chrissymas.”</p>
<p>Zayn reaches over to take his little brother from his dad’s arms. “Let’s get you out of this hospital then.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bring the Boys Back Home

"There you go, love. I’ll see you in six months for a check up, okay?" Nurse Nikki says with a bright smile.

Louis smiles brightly and nods. “I’ll ask daddy if we can come see your puppy sometime.”

Harry raps his knuckle against the door poking his head inside. “Hey, buddy, you ready to go?”

Louis nods. “Are we going to see Papa? When is Papa coming home?”

Harry sighs careful to pick Louis up cradling him to his chest protectively. “Not until next month, babe.”

They’re joined in the waiting room by Zayn and Liam. “Hey, buddy! How the lungs feel? Take a deep breath!”

Louis giggles and take a wonderfully deep breath just like his older brother tells him to. “See, Zaynie! All better!”

Harry kisses Louis’ cheek. “All that’s left is to visit Santa then get you your special birthday cake! How old are you again, Lou Lou?”

Liam smiles reaching up to rub his young brother’s cheek. “Aren’t you excited, Lou? You get to meet Santa!”

Louis nods happily and coughs into his hand. “I’m turning three! Will Santa have a birthday present for me?”

"Maybe, squirt. Let’s get going before he has go back to the North Pole though. Remember he has to fly all over the world in a few hours." Zayn says in a bored tone. He doesn’t understand why they’re feeding this Santa theory.

Harry shoots his eldest a look. He doesn’t care if Zayn is fifteen he can at least indulge his youngest brother. When Liam was six Zayn told him Santa didn’t exist and he had gotten in so much trouble for that.

"You know I think he might." It helps that Harry had stopped by to drop it off while Louis was at his appointment.

Louis claps excitedly. “Come on! Come on! I need to tell Santa what I want for Chrissymas.”

Zayn reaches over to take his little brother from his dad’s arms. “Let’s get you out of this hospital then.”

Harry smiles following after. Hopefully Christmas would be good. Most of their money went to hospital bills and medicine for Louis. He could only get two presents for each of his kids and that didn’t come without cutting the budget for their meal. “Santa won’t be there for long so we need to hurry.”

Zayn nods and starts out towards the front door with his little brothers in tow.

"Mister Horan?" A nurse says from the desk. "The doctor wants to speak with you quickly."

Harry tosses the keys to Zayn. “Just put the radio on. Something kid friendly this time.” He turns around following the nurse inside. “I’m sorry. I’m in a bit of a hurry.”

"Sorry to keep you." The nurse says sheepishly.

The doctor looks up as they enter the office. “Mister Horan, have a seat please. I just want to talk about Louis’ last scans.”

This is the worst part. Hearing about problems that his son is experiencing, it’s not something he wants to hear especially when he has to do it alone while Niall is deployed. “Please tell me it’s not bad. It’s his birthday and Christmas is tomorrow.” He can’t handle anymore bad news.

"Well, his scans have shown that he’s deteriorating quickly. His lungs were filled about halfway when he’d usually only be around twenty five percent full." He flips through the files trying to see what he can suggest. "He really needs to be careful around this time of year because of the germs. I would suggest moving him up to a check every three months."

Harry chokes, tears springing to his eyes. Louis isn’t okay and that just hurts. He wanted a Christmas miracle or whatever, but he doesn’t even get that. “I… Will he be okay?”

"He’ll be fine. It might be stress, a situational thing, we might just need to bump him up to twice a day treatment." The doctor shrugs. "We’ll just have to see next time we have an appointment."

"Stress? What kind of stress does a three year old have?" Harry takes a deep breath, closing his eyes.

"Well," the doctor says looking up, "have you recently lost a family member or has a close friend moved away? Most kids actually understand what’s going on and their body reacts accordingly."

"His father, other father, has been deployed for the past year." He doesn’t want to believe that’s the reason. If he told Niall, Niall might still go on another deployment anyway.

"That might be it. I still want you to be extra careful. Have him take vitamin c supplements if you can. Cystic fibrosis is not something we can afford to play around with." He says as he closes the file and looks up. "We’ll do what we can."

"Thank you." By the time Harry makes it to his car he’s composed himself. "Ready to see Santa?"

"Yes!" Louis cheers from his booster seat on the back.

Zayn turns the Christmas music up so his brothers can enjoy it while he talks to his dad. “I don’t know if we’ll make it in time to see some fat guy in a costume.”

"We’re going to make it. Now act nice because I just got some awful news and Louis deserves a good Christmas." Harry is trying to speed without really speeding as they head towards the strip mall.

"Awful news? Why do I feel like this means I’m going to be asking for more hours to help pay hospital bills?" Zayn huffs and crosses his arms. As much as he loves his little brother, he hates that he’s had to grow up and give up his teenage years to help his family out.

"I’m not trying to stress you out, but Louis needs to stay as healthy as he can." Harry kills the engine glad they made it with enough time.

"Of course. I’ll just tell my friends that they can’t come over- oh wait. They can’t do that anyway." Zayn grumbles as he gets out of the car.

Louis is bouncing around trying to get out of his booster seat. “Daddy! Daddy! Santa! Santa!”

He’ll deal with Zayn later. Right now he picks Louis up maneuvering through people while keeping his eyes on his sons.

"Louis, look it’s Santa!" Liam grins pointing towards the jolly old man sitting in a large green chair.

The store is just getting ready to close the line down when Zayn steps in. “Room for one more family?”

The girl shrugs and smiles. “Anything for you, Zayn. You’ll be last. See you next semester in art class!”

"Bye, Perrie!" Zayn says with a cheesy grin.

Harry elbows Zayn wiggling his eyebrows. “And who exactly was that, hmm?”

"Just a girl from my AP art class." The boy shrugs.

Louis claps excitedly and wiggles in his father’s arms. “Daddy! Down, please.”

The little girl in front of them coughs and sneezes into hand. Germs.

Harry takes a step back. “No. No no you’re staying in my hands. I… Liam I need you to run out and get that surgical mask from the glove box. The package hasn’t been opened yet.”

Liam takes his dad’s keys running off.

Zayn frowns. “You’re not going to make him wear that in public, are you? Dad, I thought you wanted him to be normal. Wearing a mask isn’t normal.”

Harry glares. “His lungs aren’t doing well, Zayn. I’d rather him embarrassed than him sick and in the hospital for something other than his checkups.”

It’s hard to explain this to a small child, but Harry tries to. “Baby, listen. Li went to get your mask. Your doctor told me that there’s a lot of nasty germs and I want you to be healthy. You don’t want to get sick.”

Louis shrugs. “Li is sick all the time! Why he not have to wear a mask?”

Zayn sighs as he realises they’re three families from Santa. “At least let him take it off the picture.”

"I was going to do that." Harry cuddles Louis close. He wishes he could just protect him from everything.

Liam makes it back holding the package up to his dad. “Here you go!”

Louis grabs the mask starts to stretch the elastic. “Look, Zaynie! A sling shot!”

Zayn smiles and grabs a receipt from his pocket before balling it up and putting it in the mask before having Louis pull back and shooting the paper far down the wall. “Watch that paper fly, bud!”

"Hey stop! It’s a good thing there are more in here." Harry manages to stretch it over behind Louis’ head and ears.

Zayn puts one as well so Louis doesn’t look so out of place. “Daddy worries way too much.”

Louis laughs and reaches over for Zayn. “Do you know what Daddy got me for Chrissymas?”

Harry lets Zayn take him while he put on a mask followed by Liam. “Santa gets your presents, silly.”

"But Zayn said that you buy my presents and just write Santa’s name." Louis says, frowning behind his mask.

Harry glares at Zayn. “He’s a liar. Santa can get you things that I can’t.” He stares pointedly to let Zayn know they’d have a talk about that later. He smiles again when they’re called forward.

Louis squirms until Zayn sets him down and he runs into Santa’s arms. “Santa! Santa, it’s my birthday!”

Santa helps the boy into his lap. “Well happy birthday! Now tell me your name little one.”

"Louis! I’m three!" He takes the mask off and smiles brightly. "Do you have a present for my birthday too?"

Santa laughs holding his stomach to play it off. “First tell me what you want for your birthday and for Christmas.”

Louis thinks hard for a second. “For my birthday, I want a new teddy bear! For Chrissymas… I want my Papa home from war.”

The man smiles. Of all the wishes he’s heard that’s probably the best one. “I have a birthday gift for you right here.”

Liam feels a frown tug at his lips. “That might not even happen, Lou. Papa is away.”

Louis happily takes the present before looking up at his brother. “But he’s Santa! He can do anything!”

"Lou, papa is thousand of miles away. Why don’t you ask for a new train?" Zayn says softly.

Harry can feel Louis’ disappointment from where he’s standing. “Open the present, Lou. I think you’ll really like it.”

Louis sighs and starts to open the present. He squeaks when he finally gets the box open. “Papa!”

Zayn smiles brightly as he takes in the sight of the brand new teddy bear with their Papa’s picture on the tummy. “See, Lou. Santa did give you papa.”

Harry squeezes Louis’ shoulder. “Santa knows what you want. Now how about we get a picture then we’ll head home.”

Louis scoots over and pats the man’s other knee. “Li and Zaynie need to sit too!”

"I’ll just stand behind you, buddy. Don’t want to crush Santa." Zayn says as he moves behind the elaborate chair.

Liam comes up leaning against the armchair. An elf takes the picture as the flash goes off.

Zayn picks Louis and the bear up and holds him close. “Say bye to Santa, Lou. He’s got to go find Rudolph and fly back to the North Pole.”

Louis waves and smiles at the jolly old elf. “Bye, Santa! Don’t forget I want my papa!”

Santa only waves getting up from his chair.

Harry runs his fingers through Louis’ hair. “Come on, love. We have to bake cookies.”

Louis claps and cheers as they head out towards the car. “Can we make piñata cookies?”

"Wrong holiday, squirt." Zayn says with a chuckle. He turns his head away from his brother before coughing and eventually sneezing. "Whoa! Excuse me!"

Harry is quick to take Louis. “You’re not getting sick, are you? If you don’t feel well let me know.”

"Dad, I’m fine." He tries to get Louis from Harry’s clutches. "It was just a cough and sneeze. Stop over reacting."

"I’m not overreacting, I’m being safe." How can he not overreact with Louis’ condition?

"Let’s just go home." Harry lets Zayn have his brother before getting into the car, slamming the door.

Zayn huffs and buckles Louis in, slipping the mask back on his brother’s face before climbing in. “There. You happy now? He’s in a bubble and nothing can hurt him.”

Harry ignores Zayn. “If he gets sick, maybe then you’ll understand.”

——————

The door swings open and the man brushes the chill from his coat. He sets the full bag in the entryway and quietly heads over to Christmas tree. He smiles at the smattering of gifts before opening his pack and placing about ten more under the heavily lit plant.

He sees the cookies there and happily picks one up and devours it before eating another and half of the third one. He downs the milk as well needing it after the sugar cookies. He sighs and cracks his neck before heading up to the master bedroom.

Once there he heads around to the occupied side and leans down and presses his lips to the nice warm forehead covered by curls. “Happy Christmas.”

Harry rolls over face pressing into his pillow. “Mm, go back to sleep, Zayn. Christmas isn’t happening until I’m well rested.”

A chuckle reverberates through the room. “I hope Zayn isn’t kissing your forehead, curly.”

"Wha?" Harry blinks one eye peering out. "Niall? Oh god this isn’t one of those things where I’m visited by three ghosts is it?" He’s pretty sure this is a cruel dream.

"No, I’m home. The government started to pull us out early. I’m home, babe." Niall smiles brightly and connects his lips to his husband’s.

Harry practically throws himself at Niall throwing his arms around him. He runs his hands all over his back in the process. “Holy shit, you’re real!”

A bright laughter sounds as Niall holds him tight. “Didn’t think you missed me that much.”

"You clearly weren’t present at our wedding then." Harry can’t help but cry tears dripping down his cheeks.

Niall pulls back. “I want to go wake the kids. How are they doing? Zayn acting right in school? Liam still a straight A student? Is Louis doing any better?”

Harry sits up tugging his boxers on over his legs. “Zayn’s gotten a job to help out and he has C’s so I’m not hounding him about it. Liam’s soaring and… Louis he’s…” He can’t help but sob. He’s had to be strong for so long it’s all coming out now.

Niall panics and holds his husband tighter. “He’s still alive, right? Oh god. If he’s dead…” The blond trembles, but tries to hold in the tears. Harry needs to have his breakdown.

He cries and cries and cries. It’s all coming out in a heavy torrent it’s difficult to stop. “He’s alive, but he’s not doing so well. His lungs were filled halfway this time. They want to do checkups every three months now.”

Niall lets that sink in. “It’s going to be okay. In home for at least three months so I’ll be here to help.” He kisses the curls he’s missed so much. “Should I wake them or wait?”

"I… Louis asked Santa for his papa. Would you be opposed to going into a box and me wrapping you up?" It sounds ridiculous he knows.

"He asked for me?" Niall can’t believe how selfless his little baby boy is. "As long as there’s air holes, I guess it’ll be okay."

"I’ll make sure. I just want to see that bright smiling face of his." It’s silent of course so they have to tiptoe down the hallway towards the living room.

Niall snags the other half of the cookie off the plate and eats it. “Go ahead and find a box that you think will fit me. I’m going to grab a drink and a snack.”

It’s an hour later when Harry has Niall wrapped in a refrigerator box standing up vertically. He adds a bow and writes ‘to Louis from Santa’ to finish it off. “I’m going to wake them up.”

Harry jogs up the stairs. He’s way too excited. There’s Louis curled up in his bed like an angel. He sits down on the side shaking Louis’ shoulder. “Lou Lou, wake up.”

Louis stretches a bit before coughing harshly for a good five minutes like he does every morning. He looks up at his daddy and smiles. “Happy Chrissymas, daddy.”

"Happy Chrissymas. Why don’t we wake your brothers up and go open presents?" Harry picks Louis up tugging his shirt back down over his stomach.

Louis yawns and nods before pointing towards Liam’s room across the hall. “Li first. Zaynie was up late reading to me.”

Harry kisses his hair shaking Liam awake. “Hey, beautiful, let’s go downstairs.”

Liam tiredly gets up going to the first level while Harry woke Zayn up.

Once they’re all down stairs, Louis perks up. There were definitely more presents than when he went to bed. “Look it, daddy! All the cookies we made are gone!”

Zayn looks suspiciously at all the gifts. This was definitely more than his dad could afford. “Louis, why don’t we start with the small ones first?”

Liam gasps though. “Geez! Look at that big one! And it has your name, Louis!”

Louis gets up and waddles over to it, anxious to see what it was. “Li, what’s it say? I can’t read it!”

"It says to Louis from Santa. Can Louis open it?" Liam’s extremely curious more than anything.

Harry takes a seat on the sofa. “You can open it if you want, Lou.”

Louis starts to tear open the wrapping, frowning when he sees a box. “Santa got me a box? Why would he do that?”

Zayn chuckles and head in the kitchen to grab a knife to cut through the tape. “Hold on, buddy. We need to cut open the tape.”

Niall’s holding his breath waiting for the minute he can pop out in uniform to hug the life out of Louis.

Zayn manages to cut through the tape and steps back so Louis can continue.

Louis tentatively opens the sides of the box before squealing. “Papa! Papa! Santa did it! He got me papa!”

Niall steps out scooping Louis up in his arms, cradling and kissing him repeatedly. “Santa flew over and picked me up. Said you needed your papa.”

Louis just hold him tightly and cries happy tears. He holds onto his papa tightly, face buried in the dirty camouflage jacket. “I needed you, papa. Where were you?”

"I was fighting bad guys to keep you and everyone safe. I’m not leaving anytime soon though I promise."

Liam runs over hugging Niall, tears pouring out of his eyes.

Louis wraps a small arm around his brother, welcoming him into the private moment. Be doesn’t think he’s ever been so happy.

Zayn hangs back. He wants his own moment. He’s missed his dad way too much to have share.

Niall kisses Louis and leans over to kiss Liam. He knows how to read all of his sons- especially Zayn. “Why don’t you two and daddy go open your presents I’ll be back.” He ushers Zayn to follow him to the fifteen year old’s bedroom.

Zayn manages to make it up the stairs to his room before breaking down and holding his father tightly. “Where the hell were you? We didn’t get a single letter! Nothing! I was so scared.”

Niall holds him, combing through his black hair. “They wouldn’t let me, it was hard and I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to make you worry, baby.”

Zayn cries into the man’s neck and holds tightly. “I did what you wanted. I kept the family together and made sure we’d be okay. It’s so tough. I hate being an adult at fifteen.”

Niall’s heart kind of breaks. “I can still be in the navy without being deployed. I’m thinking of doing something close to home.”

"But I’d still have to work to help with Louis’ hospital bills." Zayn whispers quietly. "Papa, I think I need some time to be a kid again. I’ve been having terrible thoughts…"

"Terrible thoughts? What kinds of thoughts?" Louis’ already deteriorating, he didn’t need this too.

Zayn is quiet. He doesn’t want to admit the thoughts he’s had. He wishes he could unthink some of these things. He shouldn’t be thinking about how easy it would be to smother his brother and fix all their hospital bills like that. He shouldn’t be thinking about taking his tiny brother to go swimming and pricking holes in the floaties. “Just… Unpleasant ones. They scare me because sometimes I really want to act on them.”

Niall frowns. “Babe, you have to tell me. I can’t help if you don’t tell me.”

"Promise you won’t tell dad or freak out on me." Zayn whispers. This is his deepest secret.

"I can’t promise anything Zayn you have to know that. If it’s bad you’ll need help." Niall can’t break a promise so this is the next best thing.

Zayn is quiet. He needs to say something though. “Sometimes I think we’d be better off without Louis. I just… I get really stressed and I’m suddenly thinking of different ways to… Eliminate bills.” He’s not really sure how else to say it.

Niall can’t help but push Zayn from his arms. “Zayn! Why the hell would you…?” He can’t look at his eldest. He has to leave the room to calm down.

Zayn is crying all over again. “I know! I’m sorry! I love him, I really do, but… I think I kind of hate him at the same time.” He doesn’t know how to explain it. He just feels like if Louis wasn’t sick, he’d still be a good student without a job and having to worry about a budget.

Niall goes straight to Louis picking him up and kissing him. “I think tomorrow we should hang out just the two of us.”

Louis smiles brightly. “Why can’t we have a day together except daddy? He needs some time alone.” The boy says with a smile.

Niall kisses his nose pouting. “So you don’t want to spend the day with me?”

"I do, but Zaynie and Li need you too." Louis says, kissing his papa’s cheek. He yawns and rests his head on Niall’s shoulder. "Sleepy, papa."

"I’ll have separate days for each of you. Why don’t we take a nap? I’m tired as well." Niall really is. He lies on his back Louis half on him half not, pulling the blanket over both of them.

Louis nods and drifts off into a peaceful sleep.

——————

Niall kills the engine turning to look at Louis in the backseat. “We’re here! I hope a park is okay, buddy.”

"Snow! Daddy hasn’t let me play in the snow all Chrissymas! Get me out, papa!" Louis is fighting the restraints to get out and get into the white fluff in front of him.

Niall laughs. He unbuckles Louis setting him down on the ground making sure his jacket is secure. “Let’s go have some fun!”

The small ball of energy takes off and flops himself down into a bank of cold, wet snow and just lays there before turning onto his back. “I missed snow.”

He can’t help but laugh at his son. “I’m sorry about that, buddy. Daddy just wants to protect you.”

Louis just smiles softly and shrugs. “Papa, what’s wrong with me? Why does daddy need to protect me?”

The laughter dies down until it’s silent. “There’s bad stuff in your lungs. It likes to fill them up so you can’t breathe well. If you get sick the little fighters in your body have a hard time getting rid of it.”

"Is that why Zaynie looks like he’s mad at me sometimes? Is he mad at the bad stuff in my lungs?" Louis really doesn’t understand, but he knows that stuff in your lungs is bad.

Niall bites into his lip. “That’s right. He’s not mad at you, baby. He’s mad that you’re sick.”

The brunet sighs. “But I’m not sick, I feel no ickies.”

"I know you don’t feel it, but it’s in there. Daddy and I are going to fight it though, okay? You have to fight it too." Niall lies in the snow spreading his arms and legs to form an angel.

Louis shrugs. “Okay. I’ll be brave just like you, papa.” He flops back and moves around to make angels with his father.

"You are brave. I believe in you, baby." Niall gets up beginning to tickle Louis’ sides in the process.

Louis can’t suppress the giggles and he squeaks and shrieks in happiness at his father’s touch. “Papa! Stop! Tickles!”

"I can’t! It’s the tickle monster!" Niall lowers his voice continuing to run his fingertips all over.

Louis continues to shriek and giggle until he can barely breathe. “Air! Need air!

Niall immediately stops. He feels stupid remembering that of course Louis can’t breathe well. “Okay, no more tickle monster.”

Louis takes a minute to try and get his breath back. “Snowman? Can we make Frosty?”

Niall sighs in relief. “Yeah! We’ll make the best snowman ever!”

The small child smiles brightly and starts trying to roll snow together. “I’ll make the head!”

"Okay I’ll make the ass." Niall starts balling and packing snow rolling it around to make it bigger.

Twenty minutes later, Louis has the head some and he looks to his papa. “You almost done?”

"Yeah, I made the tummy too." Niall positions one on top of the other.

Louis rolls over his circle and smiles. “Here’s the head!” It’s lumpy and uneven and larger than the tummy, but Louis thinks it’s awesome.

Niall holds his fingers up like a picture frame. “I’m not saying we’re great, but we’re better than Michelangelo.”

"That because turtles aren’t supposed to make snowmen." Louis says with a laugh. He hugs his father’s leg tightly as he admires their work. He feels a tickle in his throat and start to cough lightly.

Niall doesn’t have time to coo at Louis’ naivety. “Hey, are you alright?”

Louis nods. “There’s a feather in my throat.” He had heard his daddy say that when he coughed a lot. He starts another bout of coughing and this one hurts his chest.

Niall crouches down rubbing his back. “Does it hurt? I need you to tell me.”

The small boy nods and points to his chest. “Here. It burns.”

"Why don’t we go home?" It’s not something he wants to do, but Louis looks like he’s hurting. Hopefully it’s just nothing.

Louis pouts when he gets a break in coughing. “Can we get Mickey’s?”

"I don’t think so. You’re on a special meal plan, remember?" The doctors have had Louis on it since he could eat solid food.

"Just once? One time won’t hurt!" Louis says as he coughs again.

"No, Louis. Right now we need to get home." He’s extra mindful getting him in his booster seat. He can’t afford for Louis to get even more hurt.

——————

Louis is dozing in the back seat on the way home. He’s been coughing sporadically and now he’s starting to get warm. It’s too hot, but he can’t take his coat off because of the seatbelt. “Papa, too hot.”

"We’re home now, babe. Let me get you inside." Niall murmurs

Harry’s going around cooking when he hears the door opening. The greeting dies on his lips when he hears his son coughing and complaining. “Niall! I told you not to let him outside! Oh my god, please tell me he’s not sick!”

"If he is, it’s not from being outside. There’s no way a cold could hit that fast." Niall says as he peels the coat from Louis’ body. His baby’s shirt is soaked with sweat and he’s starting to panic.

"Daddy, can we watch Nemo?" Louis asks with a giant yawn.

Harry takes Louis away holding his chin and scanning his face. “Okay. Papa will put it in and I’m going to go get the thermometer alright, baby?”

Louis pouts. “But I don’t want the thermometer! I’m fine!” He tries to be convincing, but the coughs lacing through his words doesn’t help his case.

"You’re getting the thermometer." He walks off to rummage underneath the sink.

Niall sets the movie up and holds his baby as close as he can. “You going to watch Nemo with me, baby? I haven’t seen Nemo since the last time I watched it with you.”

Harry sprints back careful to put the metal tip underneath Louis’ tongue. “Just hold it there, baby.”

Louis is too tired to fight back or argue. He sits there patiently as he waits for the beep.

Niall checks the reading and frowns. “One hundred and one point four.”

Harry’s heart sinks. “No, no, no, no, no! He can’t be sick! He can’t get sick!” He dials Louis’ paediatrician as quick as possible, heart rate thumping.

The phone rings and rings until the voicemail picks up staring that they were still closed for the holidays.

"Babe, let’s give him a few hours to see if he gets worse. Zayn and Liam had fought off worse before." Niall says softly since his son is already asleep against him.

"You weren’t at the doctors with me! A fucking cold could kill him!" Harry is frantic pacing all around.

"He’ll be fine. He’s our little soldier." Niall says quietly as he tries to inconspicuously slip his son’s shirt off his overheated body.

Harry starts to sob. He covers his mouth with one hand locking himself in his bedroom.

A few hours later and Louis is hot to the touch. He’s lying against Niall’s chest, sleeping restlessly. Niall’s shirt in covered in sweat and the boy is shaking in his arms.

As much as he doesn’t want to, he knows he needs Harry. He heads to their room knocking lightly. “Harry? I think… I think we need to take him to the hospital.”

It takes less than a minute for Harry to come out already dressed. “I was thinking the same thing.” He gathers Louis up gasping when he touched him. “We need to go right now. Zayn!”

The dark haired boy pops his head from his room. “Yeah, dad?”

Niall heads into his room to quickly change his shirt from the sweat soaked cloth clinging to his chest.

"I need you to watch Liam. Papa and I need to take Louis to the hospital." He takes deep breaths kissing Louis’ hair in between.

Zayn frowns. “Is he okay? He just had his check up.”

“He’s just a little sick. It’ll be fine, boys.” Niall says rejoining the conversation.

Liam frowns. “Then why is he shaking and where is his shirt. Is… Is he sick? Sicker than normal?”

"We don’t know, kiddo. That’s why we have to take him to the doctor’s. We need to find out what’s wrong with him." Niall says as he ushers Harry towards the door, grabbing a shirt and jacket to throw around Louis as they head out.

Harry unlocks the car door tossing the keys. He just prays that Louis will be alright.

——————

Harry’s face is buried in Niall’s shoulder crying silently. “What… What if he’s not okay? What if he dies Niall? I can’t cope with that.”

"Shhhhhh. He’s going to be okay." Niall says quietly. He hasn’t seen his son hooked up to that many machine’s since he was born and it scares him.

A nurse comes by, “Louis Horan?”

Harry jumps up shaking with fear. “Is he alright? Please tell me he’s alright.”

The nurse jumps back a bit. “Um, I don’t know anything. I’m just a medical student. I’m supposed to lead you to the doctor’s office.”

Harry groans. “I’m sorry I’m just really anxious is all. Fuck.”

"It’s understandable." She leads them into the doctor’s office. "If it’s okay, I’ll be sitting in on the consultation to get a bit of learning in."

Niall shrugs. “Whatever. Just let me know about my child.”

Harry takes a seat inviting Niall next to him so he could hold his hand. “Maybe… Maybe he’ll be okay. Maybe this isn’t so bad.”

"It’s bad." The doctor says as he comes in. "Mister Horan, nice to see you home." He sits down and looks at the two fathers. "Louis is very sick. It’s an extremely rare virus. I don’t even know how to treat it. There’s only been one hundred reported cases of this virus and they’re all in the Middle East."

Harry doesn’t look at Niall. He isn’t going to accuse him of something he didn’t mean to do. “How bad? How bad is it?”

"At this point it’s a waiting game. His body can fight it, but since his immune system is so weak, it’ll start shutting down vital organs to try and stop the virus and if it gets that far that’s what’s going to kill him." The doctor says as he rubs a hand down his face. "Do you know how he could have come in contact with the virus?"

Niall swallows the lump in his throat. “I just returned from deployment. I barely went ashore though. I fight at sea.”

Harry is shaking all over again. “You weren’t sick or anything were you? You didn’t write us for the longest time…”

"I wasn’t allowed. Our location was a secret." Niall says softly. "Two days before coming home I was in town though. It’s where I got their gifts."

Harry nods. “Suppose it’s the toys. I didn’t even see the presents you bought them.”

Niall hangs his head. “I’m so sorry, Harry. I’ve gone and nearly killed our baby.”

The doctor sighs. “We went ahead and put him in a medically induced coma. It’s basically just going to keep him unconscious so his body can focus entirely on fighting the virus.”

"It’s not your fault. You didn’t know, Niall. I know you didn’t. I love you and we’re going to get through this." Knowing that Louis might not wake up chokes Harry up all over again.

"I suggest telling your other children and preparing them for the possibility of being one brother short." The doctor says sadly. "I hate having to tell you guys that, but I prefer to be realistic and joyous when he makes it home rather than a dreamer and depressed if he doesn’t."

"Do you have any councillors you can recommend?" Niall asks. "I want to get our oldest evaluated."

Harry furrows his eyebrows. “Why? What’s wrong with Zayn? Please tell me he’s alright I can’t deal with anymore heartbreak I might fucking hang myself.”

The room grows silent. “Harry,” the doctor says reaching over, “I know you’re upset, but please don’t say that again. If I hear again I have an obligation to report it to the psych ward.”

Niall nods. “He’s… He just said something to me and it was a red flag. I just want to make sure he’s okay.”

Harry hides his face in his hands. “What’s wrong with Zayn. I need to know now, Niall. He’s my son too.”

Niall sighs. “He said he gets stressed and sometimes has thoughts of killing Louis. I’m not worried about him actually doing it, but I’m worried he’s just stressed mentally.” He looks to his husband with a frown.

Harry’s a bit taken aback. “He better not come anywhere near my baby I swear to God.”

"He’s fine! He’s not going to do anything. I just want to make sure he’s not depressed or anything." Niall says with a huff. "Your baby? I’m sorry, I thought Louis was our son. Don’t worry, my Zayn won’t harm him.”

Harry feels like everything is falling apart. “That’s not what I meant. It’s just that I’ve spent all my time in hospitals with him it’s hard not being protective. I love Zayn, he’s my fucking son, of course I do. I just need him to be evaluated is all.”

The doctor waits for a bit of silence before writing down the name of a doctor. “This is Doctor Higgins. He’s tremendous with teenage cases.”

"Thank you." Harry takes the offered paper getting to his feet. "Is that it then?"

"Yup." The doctor stands and holds his hand out. "You can see Louis in twenty four hours. He’s in a clean room environment right now."

"Thank you, doctor, really. We’ll be back tomorrow." Harry leaves the office and stops once he’s outside and he can breathe again.

Niall stops and looks to his husband. “Are we going to be alright? I don’t want this to send our family into ruin.”

"It’s not. I’m not going to let it. I have you and the boys. Now we have to go tell them the news." Harry links their fingers together.

"This is really going to be hard. And least I’m not being deployed for another three months." The blond sighs and keeps his husband close as they head towards the car.

"You can’t just be deployed again. I can’t handle this anymore, Niall- none of us can." He looks away.

Niall shrugs and opens the car door for his husband. “It’s my last deployment before I can tell the Navy I’m done. After this one, I don’t have to go back.”

"How long is this one?" Harry ducks sitting on the passenger side.

"Six months to a year." He heads over to the driver side and gets in. "It just depends on what the H.M.S. Liverpool is called to do."

Harry shakes his head. “But you can’t be gone that long! What if Louis dies while you’re gone?”

"I know. That’s what scares me the most. I don’t have a choice though, babe. We knew what I was getting into when I joined the ranks." Niall sighs. He doesn’t need a lecture about what he’s missing- he knows.

"You have to fucking do something!" Harry shouts slamming his fist on the dashboard.

"What do you want me to do? This is my job, Harry." Niall says, his voice raising a little.

"You haven’t been around for a fucking year! If I didn’t continually show Louis pictures and tell him stories he’d have no damn clue who you are! Liam got second place at the science fair were you there for that? No. He made honor roll were you there? No. Zayn has had to work because you’re deployed. He’s won an art show were you there? No. Were you there when they got home from school, did you tuck them in, kiss them, held them during storms, cooked for them? No, no, no, no, and no!"

"I’m sorry! Okay? I don’t know what you want from me! We talked about this before I enlisted. We knew this was going happen! Did we expect to have a sick child no? But I’m not going to try and run from the Navy. It’s my job." Niall says getting even louder.

"Drive me home." Harry is done talking. He stares out the window refusing to even glance at Niall.

Niall huffs and steps on the accelerator. “So much for not letting our family fall apart.”

"It’s a two person job and you’re not helping." Harry is so frustrated by this point. By the time they get home he goes straight to his bedroom to pack a bag.

Niall calls the boys into the living room. He guesses he’s giving the bad news. So much for this being a two person job. “Boys? I need you to come down here please.”

Liam races downstairs. “Papa, why is dad packing! What’s going on? You guys aren’t getting a divorce are you?”

Niall frowns. “Liam, stay here. I’ll be right back.” He heads up to their room and shuts the door. “What the hell are you doing?”

"I’m going to stay with my mum. The boys can come if they want, but I’m not staying here." Harry continues tossing clothes into his duffel bag.

"Really? This is your idea? So this whole two person thing was just a lie then?" Niall grabs at Harry’s wrists gently to get him to stop. "I have Liam asking me if we’re getting divorced."

"Maybe we should." Harry spits out glaring at the man he married. He doesn’t move from Niall’s grasp.

"Because I won’t quit my job?" Niall lets go and throws his hands in the air. "You’re really going to throw this all away because of my job?"

"Because you’re never there! It already feels like I’m a single parent!" Harry continues to pack.

Niall rolls his eyes and heads towards the door. “You know what? Fine. Go be with your mum. Be hundreds of miles away from your sick son.”

Harry freezes closing his eyes. Of course Niall would know his weakness. “You know what, I’m not going to leave them like you do.”

"Then come help me explain to our sons what’s happening with their brother." Niall says as he throws open the door and heads down the stairs.

"I’m sleeping on the couch tonight." Harry smiles softly as he comes down. "Hey, boys. Sorry about that. Just a little upset is all."

Zayn frowns. “Is everything okay? Is Louis napping? I didn’t see him in his room when I looked in to check on him.”

"Boys, Louis is going to be in the hospital for awhile." Niall says with a tight lipped smile.

Harry sits on the coffee table. “He might not make it boys. He’s very, very ill.”

Zayn frowns. “He’s going to be okay. He has to be okay. He’s my baby brother. He’s not supposed to die before me.”

Harry sighs. He’s cried enough. “I’m sorry that this has happened and I wish that I could fix it.”

Liam curls into Zayn. “Where did he get it from? None of us were sick and with all the rules we have, I don’t understand.”

Niall looks at the ground. “It’s my fault. I brought home something from the ship.”

Zayn looks at his dads. “Does this mean you aren’t going off anymore? Are you staying home for good?”

"No, your father is leaving again in three months. You can’t talk him out of it." Harry looks at the ground sighing.

"Papa! You can’t leave again!" Zayn sighs and looks at his father. "You can’t leave again! I can’t be alone again!"

"It’s going to happen, Zayn. I’m sorry. I don’t want him to leave, but he does." Harry reaches over squeezing his fingers.

Niall sighs and smiles tightly. “And like I told your father I can’t stay even though I want to.”

"Either way he’s leaving… Again." Harry wishes Niall never joined, but it’s what Niall wanted.

Zayn huffs. “I thought the last deploy was it? I thought I was going to get my life back.”

"And you will, baby. We’ve got the name of a good doctor and we want you to go talk to him about what you told me." Niall says soothingly.

Harry kisses Zayn’s knuckles. “I’m not mad at you for your thoughts. I get that it’s tough.”

"You told him!" Zayn stands up and stares at his dad in horror. "I trusted you!" He storms up the steps.

"Was it something I said?" Harry’s confused watching Zayn leave. Did he do something wrong?

"Way to go. You couldn’t keep your damn mouth shut?" Niall says as he gets up and heads after his son.

Liam chews on his bottom lip. “Daddy? Are you leaving?”

Harry closes his eyes kissing Liam’s forehead. “No, I’m not going to. I love you, Liam; remember that.”

Liam nods. “Okay. Love you too, daddy.”

——————

Zayn turns his music up a bit more. He’s so pissed off. He can’t understand why he’s so messed up. Why does he wants to kill his little brother in his sleep? Why is he so angry at his father for trying to help him? He doesn’t understand himself.

Harry knocks on the door. When there’s no answer he peers in to see Zayn with headphones. Carefully he sits on the bed sighing.

Zayn removes his headphones and pauses his music. “Are you angry at me?”

Harry stares at the carpet hands hanging between his legs. “Honestly, I’m mad at myself.”

"What for? You’ve been there Louis. You’ve done all you can." Zayn sits up a bit and makes more room for his father.

"I’m mad because I don’t ever want to make you feel like you can’t come talk to me about your problems. I love you, Zayn, and while at first I would have been… Upset I want you to know that I love you too and your problems mean just as much to me. I know it doesn’t seem like it with Louis and I know I pay a lot of attention to Louis and I know I’m not the nicest person and I make you feel like you’re required to take care of your siblings because you’re older, but I love you. I’m sorry." Harry’s done enough crying, but when he starts he can’t stop and right now he can’t help it.

Zayn pulls his dad into his arms. “I don’t think you love me any less. It’s just complicated. I didn’t want anyone to know. The only reason I told papa was because I found myself standing over Louis’ bed one night wanting to grab a pillow and just shove it over his face.” He voice is soft, almost to the point where he can’t be heard. “It scared me because I didn’t remember getting up from my desk chair and heading to his room.”

"We’ll get you help. I think you’re just under a lot of stress. Zayn, I want you to quit your job, okay? You’re not healthy." Harry hugs back.

"I can’t quit. Papa is going on deployment again. We need the money for the hospital bills." The dark haired boy whispers. "I know I’m not mentally stable, I figured that out myself, but I guess help would be good before I do something I regret."

"No, you’re quitting your job. I’m your dad and you’re going to have to listen to me." Zayn’s health is the most important thing especially at his age when he’s still growing.

Zayn sighs, but nods. “Fine. I’ll quit my job, but if money gets tight again you have to let me get one again.”

"I will alright. I’m going to try for a better job. I’m going to take care of this family. Now why don’t you sleep?" Harry kisses Zayn’s cheek heading off down the hall.

——————

"Okay, I left Zayn on the fifth floor in the east wing with Doctor Higgins. I have to go get him in an hour." Niall says as he walks into Louis’ hospital room.

The boy’s fever had come down considerably and he was now only slightly warm at ninety nine point two. He was still in a medical coma until he was at normal body temperature.

Harry beams down at his little boy. “You’re doing so well. Come on, I know you can pull through.”

Liam is sitting near the corner twirling his thumbs.

Niall reaches over and rests his hand over Harry’s. “Hey, I’m sorry for everything that happened the other day. I was stressed and scared.”

Harry sighs. “Yeah, I was just stressed. I’m sorry for the way that I acted. I love you, Niall.”

"I love you too." The blond says as he leans in and softly presses his lips to the curly haired love of his life. "That’s why I put in to have early dismissal from the navy."

"What? Niall no I didn’t mean what I said! You need that job I mean all the benefits that come with it."

Liam at some point is tired of the conversation. His parents have done nothing but focus on his brothers. “I got an A on my science test.”

Niall keeps on talking, not even hearing his son. “I’m still being deployed. This just means that if Louis has a medical emergency while I’m at sea, I have clearance to fly home immediately.”

Harry nods. “I… Yeah, okay. We can deal with that then.”

Liam frowns sitting up, raising his voice slightly. “I got an A on my science test!”

"Yeah, they wouldn’t let me cancel my last deployment. After this one though, I’m transferring departments and staying on land." Niall says with a definitive air in his voice.

"I got an A on my science test!" Liam shouts in frustration.

Niall turns to look at his son, frown on his face. “Liam, we do not shout- especially in a hospital.”

"But you wouldn’t listen!" Liam groans slumping back in his chair. Why didn’t they care?

"Liam James Horan, you better settle yourself before I have to settle you." Niall always was the strict parent due to the military training and such.

Liam’s heart wrenches. Neither of his parents even cared.

Niall turns back to his husband like nothing even happened. “What were we talking about, dear?”

"I’m going to the bathroom." Liam climbs down and walks off down a hallway. Maybe they’d be better off if he just left.

Every hall looks the same, every turn is endless. The doors stop and then curtains cover room entrances. It’s a nurse that spots the kid. “Hey, there. You know you’re not to be in this area right?”

Liam looks up in confusion. “Where am I? I just wanted the bathroom.”

"This is the intense care unit, love. Where are you supposed to be?" She asks as she hands him a mask to cover his face.

"The bathroom." Liam murmurs looking down the three halls leading in different directions.

"Well put your mask on and I’ll take you to the bathroom, okay?" The nurse smiles brightly.

Liam stretches the strings behind his head fixing the white cup over his mouth. “I know how to put these on. My dad makes me wear them because my brother is really sick.”

"I’m sorry about your brother. What does he have?" She asks as she leads him down one hallway towards the men’s room.

"I don’t know the name, but he gets fluid in his lungs. He’s in a coma right now." He tucks his hands into his front pockets shrugging.

The nurse frowns. “That sounds like CF. That’s a tough sickness. There’s really no known cute. I hope your brother will be okay.” She stops outside the bathroom door and waves him inside.

"Yeah, it started with a c. He’s only three it kinda sucks." Liam goes into the nearest stall to relieve himself. After he makes sure to wash and dry his hands before exiting.

"He’s three? That’s so saddening." She doesn’t really know how someone at that age could continue on.

"Yeah, he got sick because my dad came back from war and brought something back." Liam continues walking in a random direction.

"Do you remember what room he’s in, love? I can give you directions." She doesn’t this kid wandering around the halls.

"No. I left because my dads don’t pay attention to me." Liam sighs looking to the tile floor.

She frowns. “I’m sure they’re just really scared about your brother right now.”

"No, they always pay attention to him or my older brother; Zayn. I try telling them things and they ignore me." He says it a bit sadly.

"Well let’s find them and show them what they’re missing then." She says as she squeezes at his shoulder.

"I don’t know where they are though. How am I going to find them?" Liam frowns.

"Well, what’s your brother’s name? I can find him in our hospital database." She says as she leads him over to the computer.

"Louis Horan." Liam says confidently following behind.

The nurse types in the name and smiles brightly. “Room 317. I know where that is. I can take you back.”

"Okay. I don’t want to see them though." They’re just going to ignore him and yell when he talks.

The nurse frowns. “Well, if you want, I have an extra pair of scrubs. You can change and wear gloves and a mask and even scrubbies around your shoes and do some rounds with me.” She won’t let the kid wander around unsupervised.

"Really? I’ve always wanted to be a doctor!" Liam brightens up clapping his hands together.

"Sure! You can’t touch anything or anyone though. You just have to watch." She jerks her head and leads the boy to the break room to get him suited up.

Liam giggles the entire time he’s getting dressed grinning to himself. “Yay! This is so much fun already!”

Once he’s dressed and ready, she starts making her rounds. “Liam, this is Holly. She’s suffering from an autoimmune disease.”

"Hi, Holly! I’m Liam!" Liam waves cheerfully unsure of what to do exactly.

"Liam, can you hold her hand while I get a blood sample?" The nurse asks as she grabs the needle she’ll need.

The teenager smiles at the small boy. “It’s nice to see a new face. I don’t see anyone except the doctors and nurses.”

Liam grips her fingers. ”I like helping out. I want to be a doctor one day.”

"I hope you do get your dream." Holly flinches at the pain in the arm.

"All done. We’ll get this to the lab." The nurse says with a smile. "If you need something, just call for Emily."

"It was nice meeting you, Holly." Liam likes her, she’s nice and definitely brave to be sick but smiling anyways.

It’s a few hours before the shift is over, but once the rounds are made, the nurse sighs. “I’m going home, sweetie. I need to take you to your parents.”

"Okay." Liam sighs. He removes the his outfit disposing of it like she told him to.

She leads him to the door to his brother’s room. “It was lovely meeting you, doll. You can always come find me, okay?”

"What’s your name? I don’t remember it." Liam frowns. He has to remember the name of his new friend.

"Nurse Jacqueline and I work in the intensive care unit." She smiles and hugs him tightly. "Now get in there."

"Okay, bye!" Liam waves entering the hospital room where Louis and his dad’s were.

"I think we should get some dinner. Do you want me to run and get food and bring it back?" Niall asks as he gets up and slips his jacket on.

Zayn grunts from his spot in the corner where he’s sleeping. “I’ll go with you. I need to stretch and get out of this hospital.”

They didn’t even notice he was gone. Liam can’t help but cry. He sits in a chair in the corner silently crying to himself. It hurts knowing they don’t care.

——————

Zayn sighs staring at the different pictures hanging on the walls. He doesn’t want to be here, but he knows it’s something his dads both want.

"Zayn, can you tell me why your dads wanted you to talk to me? They didn’t say much, just that they wanted you to talk to me." Doctor Higgins asks as he flops down in the bean bag chair across from Zayn.

"Uh, well… I’ve been having thoughts lately." Maybe he shouldn’t have agreed to this.

The doctor looks up at him. “We all have thoughts, Zayn. The kind we have define us. So what have you been thinking?”

"They’re horrible thoughts so does that make me a horrible person?" He’s fucking terrible and he knows it.

"Not exactly. If you think they’re horrible, that’s the first step to realising that you aren’t a horrible person." Higgins says as he sketches away on the paper pad. "So what horrible thoughts are you having?"

"Well my little brother Louis is sick, really sick. I have a job to help pay bills and it’s really hard. I just have thoughts about how easy it would be to get rid of him." Zayn chokes on that last sentence.

Higgins nods. “Makes sense. What’s your school schedule like? Any advance classes?”

"A lot. I’m trying to get good grades to go to uni." Zayn bites into his bottom lip.

"Hmmmmm… What do you want to major in? Chemistry? Psychology maybe?" Doctor Higgins asks trying to feign indifference.

"Uh, I don’t know. I haven’t figured that bit out yet." It’s weird Zayn thinks, knowing that people are expecting all these things from him.

"How many hours do you work a week? How much do you get paid per hour?" The doctor says as he pulls another bean bag over to lay across them.

"I work almost forty hour weeks for eight pounds an hour. It seems like a lot, but it’s not." Zayn sighs picking at his jeans.

"That’s only about six hundred and forty pounds a pay check and that’s before taxes." The doctor says with a shrug. "So how much time do you spend on homework? Do you get enough sleep?"

"I get off work at eleven, do homework until two, then wake up at five." He shifts around on the cushion.

"So that’s what? Twenty one hours of sleep a week. A healthy amount is fifty six. That’s about thirty five hours short." Doctor Higgins looks over at the boy. "How often do these thoughts occur?"

"A lot. Maybe a few times a day. Sometimes I’ll wake up and I’ll be standing over his bed with a pillow." He shivers.

"Now why do you think keeping him alive is a good thing?" The doctor says continuing to sketch on his paper.

"If I killed him my dads would disown me. Fast." It hurts knowing it, but it’s true and he’d understand.

The doctor stops and looks up from his paper. “So you won’t kill him only because of the repercussions from your fathers?”

"Well that and I know it’s wrong. I don’t want to hurt him; I love him." He looks to the clock hoping to leave already.

The doctor smiles lightly. “And that right there makes you wonderful person. Thoughts may define us, but the secondary thoughts are what truly show character.” He gets up and groans, grabbing at his back. “Our hour is up, Zayn. It’s been a pleasure talking with you. Hopefully I’ll see you again soon.”

"Yeah." Zayn wills himself not to sprint off keeping to just walking out.

——————

Niall pours another glass of wine for him and Harry, handing over a glass. “I think this is the first night where we aren’t yelling, crying, or worrying about Louis. I nearly forgot how pleasant these nights are.”

Harry rests his head on his husband’s shoulder. “I love you, you know that? It’s just stress.”

"I know." Niall says with a kiss to his husband’s curls. He rests his hand on the man’s thigh and squeezes lightly. "I’ve been home for a month and we’ve barely been in the same room together."

"There should be a law against that." Harry murmurs quietly kissing his neck.

Niall hums as he sips at his wine. “Louis will be awake tomorrow and everything will be right.” He turns and presses his lips to Harry’s own.

"I’m so glad he’s fine," Harry whispers against Niall’s lips kissing him twice more.

"I missed you." Niall practically picks Harry up and places him in his lap. "I want to be so close to you again."

Harry is breathless. “You’re so strong, babe. Able to pick me up like I weigh nothing.”

Niall smiles and nuzzles into his husband’s neck. “You do weigh nothing.” He stands, arms around Harry as he hefts him up from the sofa and starts to carry him to their bedroom.

"That’s a lie, I weigh a ton," he laughs at that resting his head on Niall’s chest.

Niall makes it up the stairs and into their room, before tossing him onto the bed. “You’re skin and bones, but I love you and how you look and how you smell and taste. I love you.” He kisses at the skin peeking out of the top of Harry’s shirt.

Harry props himself on his elbows. “I love you so much, Niall. I’m sorry for everything I said.”

"Shhhhh." Niall starts unbuttoning his husband’s dress shirt. "I just want to focus on us tonight. I want to focus on making you feel amazing."

"What about you? I think you deserve it." Harry takes the fabric off his arms throwing it on the ground. "It’s a good thing Zayn and Liam are at your mum’s right now."

"Kind of why I asked her to take them tonight." He kisses and bites lightly at the flushed skin down his partner’s torso. "I’ve forgotten how great you’ve tasted."

Harry grins rolling his eyes. “You planned this entire thing, you sly bastard.”

"I’ve been stuck on a ship for a year with fit men and not able to touch because I love you. I need you, of course I planned this." Niall says as he kisses down till he’s mouthing at the front of his husband’s trousers.

Harry cants his hips forward. “Are you waiting another year? Hurry up, beautiful.”

Niall chuckles and reaches for the belt. “Now who’s impatient?”

"I never claimed to be patient, Niall, and I certainly am not with how fucking slow you’re going." Harry narrows his eyes.

Niall rolls his eyes but shucks Harry’s trousers and boxers down anyway. He wraps his hand around his husband and starts to tug on him. “You’re so beautiful, babe.”

Harry moans eyes slipping shut. “I love you, Ni. Fuck, keep doing that.”

Niall does as he told, slowly jerking his husband off and placing soft kisses to the man’s abdomen. “When I get home from my final deployment, I’m going to fill you up with kid again. I love when you’re pregnant.”

"You think we can deal with another one?" Harry groans lazily rubbing his stomach.

"Of course. Especially since I won’t be gone most the time anymore." Niall kisses at the hipbones that jut from the man’s pelvis and bites, wanting to leave his mark.

"I mean financially, babe? We have so many hospital bills…" Harry sighs, but groans right after.

Niall stops his movements and looks up at his husband. “Hey, we’re supposed to be having a good time. Stop thinking negatively right now.”

"I’m sorry, I’m sorry." Harry really does appreciate his husband.

"Just enjoy what we have right now." Niall whispers before taking Harry into his mouth and starting to suck him off.

Harry involuntarily bucks up tugging at Niall’s hair a bit harshly.

The blond gags, but redoubles his efforts wanting Harry to come down his throat. He lets one hand splay across the lower stomach of the green eyed man and feels the muscles contracting as his body responds to the touch.

Harry’s back arches and his fingers dig in the sheets before he’s coming.

Niall milks him through the orgasm, wanting to ensure that he gets all of husband. He pulls off and kisses the delicate hipbones before moving back up the male’s torso. “God, I missed you.”

"It’s your turn. Lie down." Harry sits up pushing Niall down on his back.

"Oh, am I going to get a ‘welcome home, sailor’ treat?" Niall jokes as he looks up at his husband.

Harry chuckles, biting into Niall’s collar bone. “You’re getting more than that, babe.”

Niall’s eyes flutter shut. Harry knows that’s his weak spot and it’s not fair. “Surprise me, darling.”

Harry runs his palms up under Niall’s shirt helping him remove it. “I fucking love your chest you know that?”

"Why’s that? It’s nothing special." Niall says, pushing himself up a bit so his face is closer to Harry’s.

"It’s pale and flawless. I love it." He continues to bite at his chest marking him all over.

The blue eyed man hums and let’s his eyes slip shut as his husband continues to turn him on and tease him. “Harry, I’m already leaking. This is torture at this point.”

"Maybe you deserve it. I don’t know, I like making you squirm." Harry smirks licking at Niall’s hip bones.

Niall swivels his hips, trying to get closer to that mouth he missed so much on ship. “When did you get so dominant?”

"Hmm I don’t know maybe someone taught me." Harry laughs at that finally taking Niall into his hand.

Blue eyes slip shut as there’s finally pressure surrounding him. Warm, tight pressure. “I bet you’re so tight. Do you even finger yourself and think of me when I’m at sea?”

Harry looks up. “I fuck myself with the vibrator I have while wearing one of your shirts.”

"I bet you look so fucking gorgeous." Niall says with a whine. He’s already leaking precum and rock hard in Hary’s grasp.

Harry goes back to sucking making sure to hollow his cheeks.

Niall moans loudly and tangles his fingers in Harry’s curls. His breathing his heavy and his muscles are working overtime at the constrict and expand. “God I missed your mouth. My hand got so boring so soon.”

The brunet goes down further burying his nose into Niall’s soft tufts of pubic hair. Slowly he gets back into a rhythm, bobbing his head up and down.

It’s another minute or two of Harry’s mouth that finally brings Niall to orgasm and has the blond spilling down his husband’s throat. “Jesus, Harry.”

Harry swallows then licks Niall clean. “I love you so much.”

Niall pulls Harry up and presses their lips together, chasing the taste of himself on his husband’s tongue. “I love you too. I wish I didn’t have to leave again, but I know that it’s the last time.”

"I can’t wait for it to be over. I just need you by my side." Harry shuffles in close.

The blue eyed man wraps his husband up in his arms and hold him close before reaching down to get the sheet and comforter to throw over them. “One more tour. That’s it. Then I’m all yours.”

"Well I’ll be eagerly awaiting that. I just hope it’s only six months." They don’t need him gone for another year.

"Just remember that if something happens with Louis then I come home immediately." Niall says softly as a reminder.

"I know I just still hope it’s a short deployment." Harry shrugs his shoulders kissing Niall.

Niall kisses him back with a smile. “Get some sleep. We see our boy tomorrow..

Harry turns off the lamp light closing his eyes. Is it wrong that he never wants this moment to end?

——————

Harry is sitting next to Louis’ bed running his fingers through his son’s hair.

Niall is there as well, grasping Louis’ hand. He knows the boy will come to life any moment. It’s weird seeing his son lying so still when he knows that there’s so much energy within the small body.

Louis’ body stirs lightly as the boy starts to awaken. A soft sound manages to make it’s way past the boy’s vocal chords before his eyes slowly open. “Daddy? Papa?”

Harry leans forward petting Louis’ hair. He smiles kissing his nose. “Hey, baby. How you feeling?”

"Thirsty." Louis says, voice cracking. "Can I have some water, papa?"

"Of course, love." Niall says as he grabs the water and helps his son drink.

Harry nuzzles his nose into Louis’ neck. “You were asleep for such a long time. I was beginning to get worried.”

"I was? How long was I asleep? I’m still really tired too!" Louis says in surprise. He hugs his daddy tightly. "I love you, daddy."

"You were asleep for almost a month." Harry wraps his arms around his bundle kissing all over the side of his face. "I love you so much, Louis. I’m glad you’re awake, but if you’re tired you can sleep."

Louis shakes his head. “I want to spend time with you and papa.” He reaches over for papa and smiles brightly. “Can we get Mickey’s on the way home, papa?”

"Anything you want, baby boy. Anything you want." Niall says as holds his sons hand.

"Whatever you want to eat. We can go home and watch whatever movie you pick, okay? Papa and I love you so much our wonderful little boy." Harry loves Louis more than air.

Niall nods and pets at his son’s hair. “I’m going to call the doctor in so we can make sure everything is okay.”

Harry pulls back beaming at his son. “It’ll be alright, don’t worry.”

Louis smiles and lays back down. “Was I sick? I always sleep a lot when I’m sick.”

"Yeah you were, but you’re all better now. You’re a little fighter." Harry leans into Niall because this is the easy part, but it’s not going to be so easy after.

The doctor comes in and smiles. “Well, good morning, sunshine! I just need to check your vitals, get a bit of blood, and check your lungs before I get give you a clean bill of health.

"Be a good boy, Lou." Harry looks over to the doctor. "Is there anything else you need to do after the checkup?"

"Even if he comes up clean, we’ll probably keep him overnight to be completely sure." The doctor says as he scribbles down all of Louis’ numbers.

Louis looks up for a second, surprised. “Daddy! I was asleep for Zaynie’s birthday!”

Harry nods. “It’s okay. Zayn came to visit you. He said he loves you.”

Louis smiles. “I love him too! I miss him. He checks on me sometimes in the night at home.”

Harry clears his throat, he knows what Louis is talking about even if Louis himself doesn’t know. “He checks on you?”

Louis nods happily. “I ask him if he’s okay and he just asks me if I want another pillow.”

"You say no right?" Niall asks cautiously.

Louis nods. “Then he just kisses my forehead and tugs my blanket up and goes back to bed.”

"I’m guessing he has a pillow in his hands when he asks?" Harry already knows, but he wants to know how Louis views it.

"Yeah. He’s so nice to worry." Louis says. He doesn’t even flinch anymore at the needle.

Niall smiles. “Your brother loves you very much. He’s so upset that you’re in here, but now that you’re awake, he’ll be so excited to see you.”

"We all can’t wait until you’re home. We’re going to watch a movie with McDonald’s and enjoy family time."

The doctor smiles as he finishes what he needs. “I think we’ll do one final fibrosis treatment and let you go home. We’re technically supposed to keep you another night, but I think you’re family needs you, Louis.”

"Thank you, sir." Niall says with a handshake to the man.

Harry claps his hands excitedly. “I’m so happy. I can’t wait for you to come home, babe.”

Louis smiles brightly. “Thank you, sir.”

The doctor smiles and clears everyone from the room to begin the treatment.

——————

Harry opens the front door for Louis letting him inside while he held his son’s happy meal and Niall had everyone else’s food. “Alright, Lou, what movie do you want to watch?”

Louis thinks for a moment. “Peter Pan!”

Niall laughs as he makes it in, arms full, and bumps the the door with his hip. “My favourite, buddy! You’er the Michael to my John.”

Harry rolls his eyes. “Alright, alright let me put it on.” He sets Louis’ food onto the coffee table heading to the DVD player.

"Louis!" Zayn comes running down the stairs and spots his baby brother. The smile on his face is indescribable. He runs over, picking his brother up, and twirling him in circles. "I missed you so much! You scared me! God, I was so worried."

Louis is holding his brother tightly, smiling into his shoulder. “Zaynie, I missed your birthday. I’m so sorry, Zaynie.”

Liam trudges down the stairs much slower. His dads still haven’t paid him any attention and neither has Zayn. He takes his food from the counter and instead of going in the living room he goes to the dining room sitting at the table alone.

When Louis is reoriented, he realises that something’s not right. He frowns and heads the out the room before finding Liam in the dining room. “Li Li? I missed you.”

"I missed you too, Louis." It’s not Louis’ fault after all, it’s everyone else’s. He gets his chicken nuggets and fries out ignoring Louis in favour of eating. He wanted to be alone.

Louis dejectedly heads back towards the living room curling up in Niall’s lap. “Dinner and movie!”

Harry sits down on the sofa smiling to Zayn and Louis. “Where’s Liam?”

"In the dining room." Louis says as he moves to Zayn’s lap.

"I’ll get him." Niall whispers, kissing his husband as he passes. "Liam? Hey, squirt. What are you doing in here?"

"Eating," Liam murmurs shoveling more fries into his mouth.

Niall frowns. “Don’t you want to eat with everyone else? You okay, squirt?”

"No, I don’t want to. Shouldn’t you be paying attention to Zayn and Louis?" Liam is shaking, but he’s trying to stay calm.

"Squirt…" Niall pulls up a chair and turns Liam to face him. "Do you think that I want to be with them and not you?"

"You and dad always ignore me. I always do things and you don’t notice. I got an A on my science test and you wouldn’t listen then you yelled at me. I try and show you guys and you always say you’re busy or to leave you alone, but when Zayn or Louis ask you, you guys stop what you’re doing and listen to them. You love them more than me." Liam has tears in his eyes playing with his shirt.

Niall pulls Liam into his arms and lap. “Oh, baby, we don’t love them any more than we love you. They’re just sick, love. They need our attention.”

"So that means that I don’t get any?" Liam struggles against Niall’s arms. He wants to be alone.

Niall loosens his grip, not wanting Liam to feel obligated or trapped. “That’s not what I’m saying, Liam. I just meant that we need to make sure that they’re healthy. You should’ve told me you felt this way, squirt.”

"You wouldn’t listen to me!" Liam groans in frustration going back to his food.

"I’m listening now. Tell me everything. What do you want me to know?" Niall says as he pulls his chair closer to ensure he seems engaged.

"Nothing now, I don’t have anything to say. You’re only asking because I’m upset." Liam finally finishes his food throwing the box and wrappers in the trash.

"Liam, your daddy and I love you to pieces. You have to realise that sometimes we get so worried that we forget everything- we even forgot to be nice to each other." Niall says with a sigh. He needs a day for just himself and Liam.

Liam only heads upstairs crawling into his bed. He just wants to be alone.

Niall heads back to the living room. “Liam’s studying for a test.”

Louis yawns from his place in Zayn’s lap. “Papa, we’re leaving for Neverland!”

Harry frowns. “He can’t be studying, we need to spend time as a family. Louis just got home after all.”

Niall gives Harry a look. “It’s fine. He just needs to ace this test.”

Harry stands up. “I’m going to talk to him. He should be down here.” He heads to Liam’s room knocking on the door. He peeks in smiling. “Hey, bug, why aren’t you downstairs?”

Liam huffs. “I just want to be alone. I always want attention and now that I want to be alone, you want to talk.”

Harry lies down spooning Liam, rubbing his fingers into Liam’s arms. “Papa said you were studying. What’s wrong, baby?”

"You and papa only care about Louis and Zayn. It’s not fair." Liam says with a harsh edge to his voice.

Harry frowns turning Liam’s face so they made eye contact. “No, hold on. Listen to me, we love you. We love you the same as the others. If you feel like we don’t love you as much then I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I don’t want you to ever feel like that because we love you so much. You’re my Li Li- no one can replace you. If you ever feel like that, tell us. We won’t get mad at you.”

Liam looks skeptically at his dad. “Papa said that you guys need to focus on Louis and Zayn.”

"Papa is wrong. We can focus on all three of you. You’re just as important Liam. You’re my middle child." He kisses Liam’s temple brushing his bangs away from his forehead.

Liam sighs. “I mean, I get that Louis needs to get a little more time because he’s sick, but why does Zayn get more time? He’s not sick.”

"Well he is. He has to see his therapist because Zayn is sick. Anyway, why don’t you come with me and we’ll cuddle on the couch with you?" Harry just wants his kids to be happy.

"That sounds good… I guess." Liam smiles softly and snuggles tighter into his dad’s embrace.

Harry heaves Liam into his arms. “Man, you are getting so big.” He heads downstairs sitting on the sofa with his son on his lap.

Liam lays his head on his dad’s shoulder. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. He can get used to family nights like this.

Harry enjoys the feeling while it lasts. Having his family whole and together like this.


End file.
